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But Call Me Betsy

BABY!

- September 08, 2006

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The Bachelor, Season 547

- January 07, 2013

I decided to just skip the first hour and guess what? There's still nothing going on. He's still meeting the girls/women/girls and it is just so great to meet all of them, and they're all so beautiful and have such beautiful dental work and such shiny lip gloss that he can't take it. Is it okay to tell someone she looks great when they've just meet? Sarah has had some work done and one of the things she had done was to be poured into a white dress. What is this guy's name anyway? Dustin? Destiny? Three black girls already--that is amazing. The rest are blondes named Giana or Tiarana or Broleena. Diana forgot to tell him her name, but she did remember to braid her hair. Lesley brought a flipping football, and she's making him snap it at her. This is so embarrassing. Why does she keep saying Blue 32? Is that from Toy Story? There are like 300 girls and they all have stupid opening lines. Kristie is from Wisconsin and she's brought the best from the Midwe...

Dreams That You Weren't In

- April 11, 2008

I dreamt last night that I fell asleep for three years. The first thing I saw when I woke up was J-Lo, looking much worse for the wear; many wrinkles and come-back movies. What does this mean? On ER last night, Abby half-quoted one of my favorite e.e. cummings poems. "I Carry Your Heart with Me." Here it is, in it's entirety: i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart) i am never without (anywhere i go you go, i go, my dear; and whatever is done by my only me is your doing, my darling) i fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) i want no world (for you beautiful you are my world, my true) and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant and whatever a sun will always sing is you here is the deepest secret nobody knows (here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows higher than soul can hope or mind can hide) and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart. i carry your heart with me ...