Thursday, June 24, 2010

Why I Didn't Date Until My Mid-Thirties

I believe this is my 15th birthday. Please note the giant glasses eclipsing half my face ala the lead in Tootsie. I do remember that top I'm wearing because I liked it a lot and my mom made it for me. This was at the age that I would wake up half an hour early to be sure to curl my bangs and hair. I do think my eyebrows are cute though.

Monday, June 21, 2010

Stephen Dixon story

We're reading one for class tonight; "Man, Woman, and Boy." Just reread it in the car yesterday and realized it would've fit much better under structure. The story runs backwards in time for a large part of it and the opening is a realistic scene of two people splitting up, but that's just something the narrator is imagining happening. The story goes back and back and back like this downward spiral staircase, uncovering what has gone wrong that day and the day before and the day before to bring this couple to what might be the end of their relationship. How does he do that?

Well, first he explains how the opening scene didn't happen at all, except in his head. "They move backward, she to the couch, he to the chair. They never drank coffee, never made it; never had that conversation." Then to the current moment: "They're both reading, or she is and he has the book on his lap." The next time shift backwards to explain their trouble happens like this:" They move into the dining room. About an hour earlier, tow. The three of them. They're seated, eating. He avoids looking at her, she him. He doesn't want to talk." Further back in the day, from when he walks in the door: ""You know, I hate saying this, but the house could be neater. You're going to take umbrage, take.' Said this to her about an hour before dinner." To the morning: "He'd gone to work mad because this morning in bed--it all could have stemmed from this--he'd wanted to make love. One of those mornings: dreamed of lovemaking, woke up thinking of lovemaking, wanted very much to do it. She mumbled,'Too tired, sweetie.'" It escalates and he calls her a bitch, then it goes back to the previous day and a phone conversation she had with her mother and then back further to her explaining that she doesn't really like the way he is in bed. And so on, all the way back to his own childhood and his own parents fighting and then finally back again to the evening he started with where things looked somewhat idyllic but now seem quite different when you know what's come before it.

He creates this tension too in his story by not having very many paragraph breaks--each scene is squeezed together in these tight, tense paragraphs of argument and short descriptions and random anxious thoughts.

We'll see what everyone thinks tonight.

In the meantime, Padhraig sent me this link to illustrate how I might allow Emma Carol outdoors:

Saturday, June 12, 2010

Crazy Time

I missed the show on Monday b/c of my class, but luckily, they are replaying it tonight and I have no social life. How about if we just end the show right now and let her end up with Roberto. We love Roberto. Robert can speak 17 languages, but, mostly importantly, he speaks the language of la amor or el amore or ove-lay. They have the first one-on-one date and must take a helicopter to a skyscraper and then walk across a tight-rope to have a cheesy dinner on a rooftop and then end up a tent? Who put this date together, Evel Knievel? Aw, but the cutest thing is that they have their first kiss while floating in mid air, possibly about to tumble to their deaths. Together.

I want to like Frank, but he can't make up his mind if he should or shouldn't wear his glasses. I would say shouldn't, but without them, he has the pinched squinty look of someone who really should put his specs on.

Group date. Lots of hair gel and crappy t-shirts. OMG, the Bare Naked Ladies have shown up underneath an overpass. Who is their agent? Now, they are all awkwardly dancing and flexing their muscles in a parking lot. I count 5 pairs of sungalsses, four of which are on the tops of the guys heads. Three Lance Armstrong bracelets and counting. Not a one of them has shaved and they all have these Party of Five half face shadows (including Ali). The song they will be shooting the video to is called, "Please Run Away." How apropos.

Damn, I wrote mjore of this post during the show, but it disappeared. I cannot possibly recap. Suffice it to say, everyone hates Justin, the Weatherman cries, Ali sends home the guy with the huge ears, as well as the curly-haired buttonhook who couldn't open up a bottle of champagne and made her sit on the concrete.

But here's a little something for you. This is what happens when you try to make these things on your own.


Friday, June 11, 2010

Friday photos, a little late

A little late in putting these photos up. But look at these two charming boxers, ready to rip your head off if you come any closer to the window.

I liked the artistic arrangement of these flowers. I could never have this in my house because the cats would knock them over and roll in the dirt in about 14 seconds.

What's not to like here?

White cat = good luck, plus she's wearing a pink collar = extra good luck. You'll notice a blur in the picture. This is from the yogurt I was carrying in my bag.

A Gothic yard in the middle of South Philadelphia.


Fish art and tear drops.

This my view when I walk across the Walnut Street bridge on my way to Penn on a foggy morning.

Four Virgin Mary's in a row. The first sign of the Apocolypse.

I like this door, though it also remindsme of a penitentiary.

The Owl (made of seashells) and the pussycat.

Greek architecture.

I love the colors of this door and the giant door knocker.

Friday, June 4, 2010

I Must Use This Flip. It cost $$$$$$

You will have to suffer through more of my amateur home video crap.

Here is Jenn Bing, acting like the super star that she is:


And a short video of what my every morning is like:


Friday photos including turtles

I didn't walk a ton this week, but I have some photos to showcase. First, please see this bit of architectural detail conveniently labeled for your clear understanding:

And though it is not Easter, you may enjoy this lovely Easter egg tree.

If you look closely at this photo, you will discover an animal perched somewhere in the vicinity of the branches. It hangs out there on nice summer days, causing a ruckus.

Cat who looks like a fatter version of Ernesto.

My charms won him over.

On Memorial Day, we took Luke to a canoe park. Ten points for me for spotting the first turtle.

I made the mistake of jokingly telling Luke that I had a twitching problem and might rock the boat. That made him tell me every 4-5 minutes to sit still. Don't rock it, Aimee! It didn't help when I dropped an oar in the water and almost did capsize us reaching for it.

Shortly after this photo, Luke accidentally (?) hit me on the back of the head with an oar. Dan did most of the steering and reassuring. We encountered two spiders living in the canoe and I disposed of them in a humane way though Luke would have preferred then to be killed just as a safety precaution.

Turtle in the moss.

Trust me, there were many other turtle photos, but I won't bore you further.

And here is the other picture I promised Julie last week...This is the postcard that came with the picture she sent for my birthday. You can't really read the text in this photo, but it says, "WE shared a bear suit at an apartment party Saturday night...M4W." Love it. 

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Bubbles on the Subway

During the morning subway ride, people are mostly quiet and sleepy. It's different after 5 PM, when everyone is on their way home and chatty-ish. I like it that way; I'm not really up for anything that requires much energy or attention before 10 AM. But today, this woman got on and she was very friendly, talking to both the men she wedged between--I couldn't tell if she was friends with either of them or not. She wasn't crazy-crazy--I mean, she didn't have that unhinged look or vibe; she had her briefcase and her lunch, etc. But she was noticeably upbeat and talkative. And then, she pulled out a bottle of bubbles and blew a bunch of them into the aisle while singing a snippet of a Disney song, "Dreams really can come true!" The girl next to me was smiling at the woman, I started at the ceiling, unsure of why this was making me feel uncomfortable--maybe b/c I was embarrassed for the lady or because it seemed just slightly too much. Then I got on the trolley and sat across from a teenager who was blaring his music. I tried first to be Zen about it and say, Oh, yes, this is a song I haven't heard. I will just experience it and enjoy it and appreciate the fact that I have ears and can hear it. But I could feel myself getting irritated and having a fake conversation with him where I said something like, "I don't want to be forced to listen to your shitty music. Not any more than you would want to have to listen to my Liz Phair collection against your will." And so, at the next stop when a bunch of people vacated the car, I moved up toward the front. I could still hear the music, but it was less distracting. Part of me wanted to apologize in a way, like, "I am so sorry. I know it looks like I'm moving b/c I hate your music, and it's true. Please don't think I'm being prejudiced." When I got off the trolley, the kid was looking at me and I was trying to understand why he would want everyone to hear his music--I thought, Maybe he's lonely and he's trying to impress girls with his taste in music. Maybe music is the only thing he really enjoys. Maybe he's partially deaf and he doesn't realize that it's so loud. I fantasized about handing him my ear phones. How passive-aggressive is that?

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Racism Still Thriving in South Philadelphia

On my way home from the gym, saw this white lady lean out of her car and scream, "Watch it, you dumb Chink!" because the other driver didn't let the screamer go when it wasn't her turn. I thought briefly about stopping and asking the crazed woman if she was on her way to the hospital or like the police station--because otherwise, why is it so important that you get to go first at a four way stop? Where was she racing to? Acme? I believe they're open late. And what was amazing about this was that the slur was just right there--right at that second, totally accessible to her which suggests that she has perhaps used it before.

Here is my new favorite website: Project Rant. They make videos from real posts they find on Craig's list. The one I just watched was called "To the Guy who Farted in Queen Soopers." Since I just bought a Flip camera that I don't need, I have to come up ways to use it, aside from filming the cats who don't really do anything interesting. Please send ideas.

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

One-Dimensional Men

Don't judge too harshly. We did this in 10 minutes after the show was finished. Quite obviously. Will try to improve in subsequent posts.