Terrible nightmare recently where I was teaching a shop class and the kids (mostly teen boys) were totally disrespectful and unruly and I screamed at them, cussed at them, threw one girl out by dragging her chair and depositing her in the hallway after tipping her sideways and calling her a douche-bag. Kicked out another kid for making a snide comment to his friend, and yelled, "I don't need this job. I don't care if you drop this class. I don't care if you all drop this class! I'm really much nicer than this!" I continued. "You need to get to know me!" What I planned on teaching them in shop class, I have no idea. It might be related to this book I'm reading, A Man Called Ove. I accidentally saw the last few pages last night and see that he will die at the end. It's been hinted at. He has a bad ticker. But still. He's a handyman, a self-taught jack-of-all-trades fixer upper. When I was reading last night, I thought, Why haven't I ever learned how to fix a radiator or repair a bike tire? Perhaps that's why I was dreaming of teaching shop.
The train. I'm back on the train now. The other day, while I was waiting at the train door, as we skimmed toward the station, I saw the tracks on the ground flashing by. I thought, What I drop my phone? So many more dangers out in the world, so many other ways to make mistakes. I made one last week by getting on the 7:45 express train to Newark. Didn't realize my mistake until the conductor looked at my ticket and let me know we would not be stopping at New Brunswick. No wonder the train was so crowded. No wonder I couldn't get a seat. I won't make that mistake again, and it didn't turn out to be that difficult. I read a story while watching the other stops rock by, then stopped at Newark, bought a coffee at the busy train station, and got right on another train headed back toward New Brunswick. Neither conductor gave me a had time about not having the right ticket. My fear was realized and it wasn't that bad.