Consumed

I have been feeling very self-righteous lately because I have managed NOT to blow all of my prize money on something dumb like a gigantic trampoline or a 500 gallon aquarium. And then to my own shock and amazement, I ordered an i-Pod. Why did I do this? Well, in my defense, there were many different factors involved. Jess and Scott had sent me a $40 gift card from Target as a house-warming gift. At first, I was going to be really responsible and buy like $40 worth of sponges or a toaster, but then I just couldn't decide, and plus, Target is really close to my house now if I need to get anything from there post-haste. Second, I've been thinking about how I might walk more if I had a better soundtrack than the sounds of buses and of helicopters flying above my house (as was the case this morning). So, if I have an i-Pod, then maybe I'll walk more or go to the gym more. Look, it's a possibility. Finally, someone recently mentioned that it's not that hard to put songs on it. I guess I thought it would be a task similar to adding extra RAM to your desktop computer, but apparently, you just hold the i-Pod up to the CD and it absorbs the music through osmosis. Perfect! Again in my defense, I bought one that's been previously purchased and so was $10 cheaper--add that to the $40 from J & S and the I got a 2 GB thing for under $100 including shipping and tax. 2 GB is roughly 500 songs. I only know like 30 songs total, so it should be no problem to cram them all on. How many songs did Billy Joel write anyway?


Okay, but I am feeling a little consumer crazy, because I also just ordered a new cell phone. Listen, I have never once taken advantage of the free phone every 2 years deal and just realized that I can get a new one for nothing and so I picked one out and it has a camera in it. All this new-fangled technology! I resisted the cell phone for years and years and years, and also the laptop and also the car (didn't have a car for like 10 years) and now I feel slightly guilty for owning all of these things and feeling unable to imagine what it would be like without them.



I still love taking the subway, however. Today, I sat next to an older woman with a shock of short white hair who was reading a paperback. I glanced over at the title: Morning, Noon, and Night by Sidney Sheldon. For those of you who don't know, Sidney Sheldon writes books that are only a little more elevated than the drugstore bodice rippers. The kind of book that you tried to read in the library as a 13 year old, looking for the good parts. The one line I could catch from the book she was reading was the last sentence of a chapter, something along the lines of (and it was written in italics): "Yes, he knew that one day, he would own her, come hell or high water..."

It's probably harder to write a romance/mystery/thriller than it would seem at first. I know I tried endlessly in junior high to write stories based on TV detective characters, mostly Remington Steele, and it wasn't easy. But it can't be too too hard to write a pulp romance. I believe there are gradations of these books. Some are very veiled and innocent--like, the pirate will give the aristocratic lady "hot, hungry looks" or she'll be able to feel "his rippled muscular chest beneath his pressed white shirt." And then others are much less subtle and will talk openly about rigid manhood. Someone should write a parody novel, if that hasn't already been done.

Comments

Dale Varnson said…
to quote saint bono, the i-pod is more than just a product. it is object art. i'm not sure what that means, but i-pods are the greatest inventions of the last 50 years or so. i'm never without.
Aimee said…
Can you tell me why? I've heard that from a bunch of people, but why is it so great?
Anonymous said…
I thought about this after our lunch conversation and realized it's b/c I like having a soundtrack to my life. You ever watch a movie, and it's this perfect scene, where something dramatic is happening, and there's a perfect song in the background? Well that's what it's like...ok I'm being overly dramatic about the iPod, it's just cool, you'll be addicted to it once you start using it.
-Irina
Aimee said…
But, see, what I don't quite understand yet is how this is different from like having a mixed CD or tape?
Anonymous said…
b/c you can shuffle the songs and they will play in a different order, it's a surprise everytime...
-i
Aimee said…
But do you have to always always pay for them or are there other places you can get free music? I know I am being dumb!
Dale Varnson said…
my ipod (i splurged for the big one) has over 7,000 songs on it and is still not full. having that much of your favorite music at your disposal at all times is amazing. it's like carrying your record collection in your pocket. also, there are plenty of places to *acquire* cool music for, um, free.
Aimee said…
Yes, thanks for the link...I don't even know if I know 7,000 songs. I only have 500 on mine. But you can delete and add, I guess. Oh, god, now i'm feeling really greedy and wishing i could put a bajillion songs on it.
Liz said…
I love my ipod for the following reasons:

1. It keeps me from talking out loud to myself. Or at least it gives me cover. People think I'm singing.

2. I never leave to get in my car for a long road trip and discover that my fave CDs were left behind in my home entertainment center.

3. I can switch from Chris Mills to Practically Einstein without dumping the contents of my bag all over the floor of the subway OR causing a 12 car pile up on I-95.

4. I can make myself cry for cathartic reasons and then cheer myself up (i.e. switch from Chris Mills to Practically Einstein) before I get to my destination.

There are more but I'm confident this will be sufficient.

If it were legal in PA (and would provide me with tax incentives) I would marry my ipod.
Aimee said…
You are SO the 5,000 person I've talked to who wants to marry his/her i-Pod. Where have you been all weekend, by the way?

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