But Call Me Betsy

Liz was going to be my blog partner, but she has decided to branch out on her own and I'm writing this down to inspire her to make her blog already. (Note for later: She did make one. View it here ). We had a discussion at work about myspace.com today. I don't understand what you're supposed to do with it. I created a Friendster account years ago but I never ever never go there, because once I'm there, I don't know what to do. Click on things? Find friends? Everyone always puts these ridiculously gorgeous pictures of themselves up. Can you become popular in the myspace world? Does anyone my age have myspace? And why do people put music on their myspaces? It's annoying. Maybe if you write your name in the body of your blog, people can find you anywhere. Speaking of beautiful pictures, here is Lina, my friends Julie and Danny's (see Bump pic) sad and squirrel obsessed dog.

Met Shawn and Liz at Ludwig's yesterday to watch Mexico play Argentina. The air conditioning was broken at Ludwig's for half the time we were there and so rivulets of sweat ran down my back, my temples were sweating, and I was able to pile my wet hair on the top of my head where it stuck without bobby pins because of the humidity. Luckily, there were $4 big plastic cups of beer to keep us cool, though even they seemed slightly tepid. It was like being at a big keg party with a bunch of sweaty (though largely Mexican) frat boys. Shawn was cornered by a very very extremely extraordinarily, I-can't-believe-he's-still-standing drunk man who'd gotten to the bar at around 8 AM. He was either German or Russian--I wasn't sure because I kept inching away from him as he had that "timber!" look about him and I imagined him doing a nose-dive into my chest on his way to the sticky floor. Liz showed up and we talked about sperm donation and I asked the guy nex...

I took a vacation day yesterday b/c I realized on Monday that I actually have accrued 4 days that I must use up by the end of June. Decided to go to Pearle Vision to get the hard gas permeable lenses replaced; the ones that I have to pull out of my eye at least twice a day because they seem to attract little bits of sawdust constantly. In fact, I've been wearing two old lenses having lost the two newer ones--one is forever in the Coffee Bean and the other disappeared in my bathroom. I'd gone to Will's Eye Hospital on Wednesday and was there for over two hours. Since they're a hospital and can get tons of insurance benefits, they try to do every possible test on your eyeballs. Also, they had one younger guy give me the exam and then the head doctor came in and gave me the exact same exam (though truncated). They dilated my eyes which was really not necessary and caused me to walk around blinded for half the day, sheilding my eyes in the sun like Vampira. They also wan...

1. I really liked it. 2. I didn't quite understand what was happening or why, but I liked that about it. 3. I loved how, at the end, I was super confused and then had to make up my own conclusion and then I really liked it. 4. I totally related to that moment where the dog ate that other dog and then puked and a kitten came out because that happened to my dog once too. 5. It seemed like you kept using the word "the" over and over and then I realized that when you wrote "the" you really meant "humankind," right? 6. Are you a lesbian or not? 7. You leave out a ton of details and setting stuff and it makes it so you have to guess everything and I enjoyed that. 8. I liked how s/he wrote that scene that had nothing to do with the story at all because it was interesting to know what had happened to the grandmother just as an aside. 9. I totally cracked up when I read the word "fuck." 10. I would leave it exactly the way it is right now except mak...

Went to see Al Gore's new Powerpoint movie, An Inconvenient Truth , wherein he clearly illustrates with overwhelming evidence that global warming is a very real threat and that things are rapidly going to hell. And guess who uses up the most energy in a way that causes the increase of global warming? George Bush and his constituents. And did you know that we and Australia are the only two countries in the entire world who refuse to sign the Kyoto agreement? Because we don't want to infringe on GM's ability to make more money by producing shitty cars that eat up gasoline or disrupt the oil industry in any way which still has trillions of dollars to make. Here are some things that happen with global warming: 1. The polar ice caps melt and some huge chunks can fall into the ocean, thereby raising the ocean level by twenty feet which basically puts large amounts of heavily populated land masses (including San Francisco and New York City) under water, killing and/or displacing...

Shawn got his head shaved at Chop Shop on South Street while I sat in a chair near the front, trying to write in my journal, but it was too interesting in there to concentrate on anything but staring at everyone and eavesdropping on conversations. This one black guy was giving another black guy the same exact hair cut as he had--short and shaped into jagged angular lines in the front. He used some kind of small tool to take off individual hairs and then a razor blade to finish it up. He took great care while doing it. One guy over was a man getting a crew cut and his hairdresser also spent a lot of time with him. The guy had his eyes closed sometimes (the client, not the hairdresser) I guess because it's somewhat pleasant and hypnotic to have someone lavishing attention on your head. Shawn was in and out of the chair in less time than these other guys because he gets the straight on buzz, not frills, no neck shaving. I didn't get my hair cut then, but later, after we parted...

So we went to see this band last night at the World Cafe which in in West Philly. We didn't get there until around 9:45 b/c Shawn had a late meeting, but the place wasn't packed or anything. The band we went to listen to is called something like I Am Sam or Sam I Am or Green Eggs and Sam. I've recently come to grips with the knowledge that one of my favorite things to do in the world is people-watch. I'm constantly evaluating people and trying to guess what their deal is and finding ways to feel superior to them. Here's who was at the bar last night: 1. A couple Shawn referred to as us only more hipster. The guy had a beard similar to Shawn's and was wearing two mismatched shirts, one on top of the other. The girl had a wispy haircut pulled back into a tiny ponytail. She wasn't wearing any make-up and she had this kind of bland self-possession and calmness that went perfectly with her glass of white wine. She was small framed but had huge boobs or at le...

Finally, we are able to see just how talented Paris Hilton really is with the unveiling of her new video and premiere song "Worship My Extensions." The video has two settings and two costume changes. The majority of it is shot in black and white on the beach and Paris wears a bikini and a gigantic platinum wig. The other scene shows her in a ball gown. Paris basically has three moves she repeats over and over and over--hands thrown over her head in self-conscious abandonment, hands raking through her fake hair, and hands pressed against a fake palm tree while the beefcake generic guy in the video nuzzles her neck. It's amazing to watch someone who is attractive exude so little sex appeal even as she's crawling across the sand ala Madonna in "Express Yourself." The only way I can account for such a vapid video is that she must've had one of her boyfriends direct it or maybe her dog, Tinkerface. But maybe I just haven't watched enough music videos and ...

Yes, okay, I bought a microphone for my computer--it was only $12 from Target. I confess that I had a short daydream that I would start podcasting and become famous as a result of my poignant yet humorous insights into the state of this modern world. For a period of time when I lived in Chicago, I used to record journal tapes at night mostly about this guy or that guy and about how shitty I felt. I liked to listen to them later; it made me feel more like a real person because in those days, I was even less sure of who I am than I am now (is that a sentence)? But I actually do not know how to upload the wav file or this other short movie of Gretel that I have. Help me! I can however show you Gretel (see above).

Before I list a few cool things of late, I have to mention something I saw yesterday on my way to writing class after exiting the subway. First of all, the City Hall station always reeks of pee. It's so disgusting. Plus, I frequently get lost. One time, I emerged from the subway to find myself like ten blocks away from where I needed to be. Miraculously, I managed yesterday to get out quickly, only to be confronted with a sight that got increasingly more icky as the details started to come through. There was an old homeless guy with wild white hair and full beard sitting on the steps smoking a cigarette. Two policepeople were standing next to him and so was this younger blond woman in denim shorts who didn't look too with it herself, though it seemed unlikely that she was with the old guy. Then I noticed that the old guy still had a plastic cup of beer next to him. Just the way his head was wobbling, you could tell he was pretty drunk. Then I noticed that there was blood on the...

Shawn and I watched part of the middle school National Spelling B last night...We saw the grand finale, the spell down between a girl who resembles Winnie from The Wonder Years and a super dorky girl with a round moon face and blond hair. She won. You could tell whenever one of them was familiar with the word because she would be swallowing back a smile even while asking for the definition and the origin. Here are a few of the words they were asked to spell: Aijyjhkhgatsis (Japanese; means hemorraging of the left eyeball) Floughtlie (pronounced "Flute," the last several letters are silent; means the nightgown your grandmother wore on her honeymoon). Triiiriririrrskank (German; defined as the shoes a gnome is said to wear on New Years Eve). You have to wonder what it's like to be that kid who goes to spelling B's, whose parents quiz her or him every single day; they must dream about letters and words all the time; they must spell all the time. I remember just from wat...