Last Day: Cry Freedom

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I start my new job tomorrow. What if I do something really dumb like forget to set my alarm and show up three hours late or accidentally ingest LSD and start tripping in front of the Provost? Or make an inappropriate joke or walk around with my skirt unknowingly tucked into my underwear (this happened to me in real life once). I hope I can do this job. I think I can, but I feel like I have to go in there on the first day and start making flow charts and setting up meetings and illustrating how assistant director-ish I am.

Isn't it true that beginning a new job is supposed to be one of the top ten stressors in life, right up there with death of a loved one and moving? To my own personal top ten lists of fears, I would add (1). being judged by the grocery store clerk for not buying healthier food; (2). getting a horrible hair cut because I don't stand up to my hairdresser when s/he starts shaving my head which reminds me of another fear I just came up with the other day; (3). becoming so frustrated with my hair that I momentarily lose all sense and give myself really short, uneven bangs; (4) the apocolypse. I think about this more than I should especially after hearing W speak or after learning another new, horrifying piece of legislation his administration is trying to enact; (5) realizing half-way through a work day that what I'm wearing is horribly mismatched (this has happened to me several times. I once went to work wearing one black boot and one brown boot); (6). death of my cat; (7). and waking up one day and realizing that I've spent my entire life being afraid of dumb things.

Fears I've learned to live with: (1) tripping over nothing on a public sidewalk. I do that on a regular basis and it no longer phases me.

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