But Call Me Betsy

The old saying that "you can't judge a book by its cover," is simply not true, at least as it applies to actual book choosing. It's untrue not just for the reason you might think. I believe you can judge a bad book by its cover, or at least, you can judge whether or not you will be interested in the book. For example, I never pick up a book that has planets and spaceships on it. I also only infrequently pick up books with women in hoop skirts pressed against shirtless pirates. But you can also think a book will be good because you like the cover, and then find that you've been led astray. Most recently, this happened to me with a book that had an arresting image on the front and a promise of a mystery in the description on the back. The story itself was a disappointment. So, the premise is about this artist woman from the city who moves to a small town so that she can focus on her writing. She secures this amazing farmhouse with a giant barn. However, shortly a...

I read Lauren Burkett's The Shining Girls in about a week.Well, a year and a week, because first, I checked it out from the library and didn't finish it, and then I recently found a paperback version for sale at the same library for $2 and so bought it, Do you know about this book? Writer Tana French has endorsed the novel, but I don't necessarily trust her judgment anymore, not after reading The Secret Place , which was a really long literary version of Dawson's Creek without the intrigue or multidimensional characters. The Shining Girls does this odd thing where it straddles two to three genres at one time. It's an historical book about a serial killer who time travels to find and murder his victims, women he sees as" shining;" meaning that they are particularly vibrant and strong, not your typical victim. He doesn't just kill them, he dissembles them, pulling out their intestines and doing the killing slowly, because it turns him on.The her...

I feel a little bratty these days--partially because I am living in one of the most privileged- filled towns in the country, a place where the very smart merge with the very wealthy and where no one looks before crossing the street, either because they are day-dreaming about string theory or because they are accustomed to being the center of the universe, where the normal modes of behavior (looking both ways) simply doesn't apply to them. The other reason I feel spoiled is because I signed up for this monthly online stylist service, where you give this company your sizes and a sense of your personal taste, and they then send you five pieces of clothing and/or accessories to choose from. You can buy all of it for a discount of 25% or you can buy none of it and pay the $20 styling fee, or you can buy the items individually and pay whatever they cost, minus the $20.  The first time, I thought I liked everything (have yet to wear two of the shirts) and so bought everything ...

Did you drink enough Gatorade? Do you have a power bar? Crack? Did they have to time this last show with daylight's savings when we all got up at 5:30 this morning instead of 6:30? The previews promise tons of tears mostly by Chris and a promise that the entire country will be talking about the shocking turn of events that will be taking place. What could that be? One of women is transgender? One of them is already married? One of them made up the whole story about being a fertility nurse? I mean, really, there are a finite number of options. He picks one or the other or he picks neither. My favorite ending would be if he picks one and she says, Naw! That has never happened. The women never pick; they always get picked. Whitley is first. Everything about her seems phony--but only like sort of phony--like generic phony. And she won't stop talking and she is wearing a giant gold necklace. Oh, dear, she won them all over with her heartfelt toast where she said something about fa...

From the previews, it seems clear that there will be lots of pained facial expressions and mascara running during this marathon episode. Kelsey wears bright green, Britley puts on serious Mac dark lipstick and crazy girl looks hot as all get out in her silver sparkly shirt. All will be superficially revealed. Chris is going to a party with a bunch of women who may or may not all be his ex-girlfriends. They are all wearing straw cowboy hats. Is this him showing up at random Bachelor parties? How odd. We jump right in with a flashback of Carly saying mean things about Britley. All the girls attack her because she is so fricking beautiful. She is not an ugly crier even. This is why the episode isn't at all interesting--because it's just a bunch of shouting and women trying to get air time. Carly points out that Britley would say one thing to them and then another to Chris. Brit delicately suggests that Carly is demonizing her because she's jealous. I am proud of her for usi...