But Call Me Betsy

It’s all about the recaps. It’s a show made of recaps from previous shows. I purposefully skipped the first 40 minutes. These guys are all a bunch of idiots. They are turning on one another. Wes has not shown up, because he will probably come in at the very end for some kind of surprise. They are all trying to humiliate Jake because he is too perfect and too sweet (however, he just referred to himself in the third person; kind of irritating). I don’t remember any of these guys, to be honest. Who are these women in the audience? Oh, okay time for a short break because the show has been on now for three minutes. You know what, I’m going to go ahead and time the difference between the commercials and the actual airtime of the show. >Show returns at: 8:47 p.m. Don’t forget the 20 minutes of clapping in between the scenes. I can’t tell you how much hair mousse has been used in the making of this show. Dave is the crazy dude who has decided to grow a beard for the recap Juan is being atta...

Have you missed my South Philly window pics? Me too. So many cats in windows, so little time. Here's one who needs a nail file to break out of her jail. Patriotic cat. Look closely. This is not a cat; it's a cranky doggie. I love how this kitty has such a bright pink collar. Very luxurious against the lace curtain. A real modern nun sighting. I had to pretend to be taking a photo of the church. What does she look like? Wait for it. Like this!I love how her hands are clasped, as though she's continually counting the beads on her rosary even when it's not there. Drinkers. Shy kitty. Friendly out door cat who I wanted to take home. Bleeding Jesus + art deco. A photo challenge: find the two cats. My new BFF. Spines of books in Lambertsville. Me petting a horse. Shortly after this, a white horse came over and kicked this one in the chest, clearly jealous. Dan and I were splattered with mud, but otherwise uninjured. Reminds me of Gretel, dead now for about 3 years, but always...

My mother has strenuously warned me against watching The Bachelorette ever again, because she thinks it's making me stupid. I can't in good conscious disagree. However, here we are once more. I'm delaying turning on the TV, because I don't know if I can actually write about the show for an entire two hours without permanent brain damage. Okay, here we go. First, we see Kiptyn , looking as though he's channeling a young Indiana Jones in a leather jacket (in Hawaii?) and a perma five o'clock shadow, though his ears remind me of the movie Dumbo . Julienne Carrot has decided to take the overnight dream date because she is falling in love with the real Indiana Jones. And now Reid enters in white sneakers; the one she's trying to pressure into asking her to marry her after three dates. She won't stop asking him if he likes her, if he wants to "go" with her. It's irritating. He's clearly going to be the one to "break her heart." Wh...

Last writing class tonight for awhile and the people in the class gave me a copy of John Cheever’s writings wrapped in an adorable piece of sheet music and a card. I know it was Halimah who did it. Isn’t that sweet? I said, Thank you, but I can’t go out for drinks with you like I promised because I have to get home at take off this bra and blog about The Bachelorette. I hope you all appreciate it. They were great, honestly. Missed the first 25 minutes and had to do things like feed the kitties and feed the stray cats and put on my pjs and drink some water and put things away, etc. So, I’ll just recap quickly: Jillian has a date with Reid who sometimes needs glasses and sometimes doesn’t. They laugh and laugh because they don’t know how to speak any Spanish! Like, really? Neither one of you bothered to look up just a little Spanish so you can say “I’m fine” (Read instead said, “Yo soy grande” which translates to “I am big.” Maybe he was trying to hint that he’s well-endowed? Tricky...