A as in...

The other day, someone I don't know asked me to give her my email address over the phone. For whatever reason, she had trouble hearing what I was saying, even when I went really slowly. I did that thing where you say the letter, and then give an example. I always say, "'A' as in apple, 'B' as in boy..."

She was very confused, and when she repeated what she thought my email was, she had written down something like,"applelisaappleboyrightintoexchange@gmail.com."

We started again.

"No, the letter 'A' as in apple..."

She said, "Okay, apple..."

This went on for some time until I just started saying yes, that's right, and accepting that I would never get an email from her, though someone with a thirty-five letter username would likely be receiving her message.

I told my friend Adam this, and he said he had an idea for a skit, where you're in an office setting and start spelling out your email to a client, but using really profane, inappropriate language, as if it's nothing: "Yes, that's right, A as in anal, l as in labia, b as in bestiality, a again as in ass..." You get the gist.