Jimmy Fallon IS Kate Gosselin

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This won't be as funny if you haven't seen the actual performance, but...

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Farewell, Joseph W. M. or "Sadly Missed"

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Yesterday was Joe's last day and he has spent the three weeks since giving his notice locked in his office trying to finish a feature and tie up loose ends. I did manage to drag him out to the dollar store where he bought me a Diet Coke (50 cents). Later, we all went to Lucky Strikes for a fare thee well hurrah and I had the lowest score, mainly because I can't throw the ball without spinning it or thunking it directly into the gutter. I discovered that Joe is excellent at recognizing movie quotes in like one line, particularly those related to Top Gun . He also got ones from Bull Durham and The Princess Bride ("As you wish.") Did not get the one from Pretty Woman. Joe wore a bowling shirt and approached the lane with his quiet confidence. Alberta, who claims to have never been in a bowling alley in her life, beat out Joe by a few points to be the surprise winner. I had secretly hoped I would be a natural bowler, but I was not. The only real casualty of the day was ...
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For Jen

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Here's my email to my bestest friend in high school...We just recently got in touch and she wrote me back. Her responses are in caps (slightly edited to protect the not so innocent): Jen A Bee! Sorry for the delay in responding--I am have a crazy couple of weeks, though that's no real excuse. You were in my dream last night--I was at my home in Florida and you dropped off a package that had all these photos in it that showed what you'd been doing for the last 10 years. ((WAS MY NEW SLAM BOOK INCLUDED??)) How much more obvious could a dream be? You looked really cute--same Jen, curly hair and well put together outfit. ((SAME CURLY HAIR, YEP - NOW RED TO COVER-UP ALL THE GREY. NOT SO PUT TOGETHER ANYMORE - QUITE LAZY.)) I can't believe Haley is on the pill. Isn't she still like 7 years old? ((17 IN OCTOBER! SHE'S COMING THIS SUMMER WITH HER BOYFRIEND! WHY DIDN'T OUR PARENTS LET US SMOKE POT AND SHAG OUR BOYFRIENDS IN THIER HOUSE? (WITH THEM KNOWING?)JUST KIDDI...
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Uncomfortable with Weird People

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Padhraig and I were at Java Company the other day and this girl came in wearing bright red tight hot pants. She also had dreadlocks and a jewel glued or stapled to her forehead. She sat down next to us and began writing in her journal, a small book with a fairy on the cover. A few moments later, her friend joined her--a man wearing what can only be described as a smock with roomy pants. He also had a jewel Scotch taped to his head. They sat there together, talking about...I don't know what, but halfway through, she started doing yoga exhalations or speaking in tongues. It reminded me of being back in college with a bevy of theatre majors and how I just couldn't fit in with some of them--the more hippy-ish ones, those who could contort themselves into pretzels while talking about the Dali Lama and ingesting LSD. I was always intimidated by them. I am strange, but I could never be that strange or that certain degree of strange or maybe it's that brand of showoffishness. I am ...
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